I’m sorry. I thought this was the best thing ever

Written by fredward on September 1st, 2004

A man went into confession and told the priest “forgive me father, for I have sinned. Yesterday I was out golfing and I cursed.” The priest told the man to tell his story. So he started, “well, I was on the 7th tee when I hit the perfect shot. Long, straight, middle of the fairway, you couldn’t ask for a better shot. I went up to my ball and I wasn’t even 30 feet from it when a squirrel runs by, takes my ball, and then proceeds into the woods.”

The priest cut him off and said “and that is when you cursed.”

“No, no, that’s not it” the guy told the priest. “Just when the squirrel reaches the rough a hawk flys by and snatches up the squirrel, still holding the ball, and starts flying off.”

Once again the priest cut him off and asked “Is that when you cursed?”

“No, that wasn’t it either, father.” The guy told him. “As the hawk was flying, it dropped the squirrel and the ball over the green and the ball ended up about four feet from the pin.”

Once more the priest cut him off and said, “Don’t tell me you missed the fucking putt.”

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